I Was Afraid to Look Back-Part 2 Why?


For about 12 years after the launch of my meditation deck; Awakening the Goddess I painted fast and furiously.  I probably completed a couple hundred paintings over those 12 years.  There were write ups about me in local health and wellness newspapers and anyone who knew me, knew me as a visionary artist.  I did about 100 soul portraits, collaborated with other artists and loved what I was doing.

Until 2006 when I stopped painting completely.  I didn’t start painting again until 2012 so there were 6 years where I created nothing by way of artwork.  I was no longer known because of my artwork.  People connected me with a network marketing company.  The visionary side of me went into hiding as far as the public was concerned.  I was still psychic, intuitive and visionary but I kept it to myself.

Just recently I discovered one of the reasons why.

Psychic perceptions, mystical experiences and visionary art are difficult if not impossible to verify with the left brain.  We live in a society and time where if things can’t be verified they can’t be real.  We rely on scientific evidence or material evidence that something really exists.  Our world is a left brained thinking world.   I have gotten caught up in this left brain thinking myself because is is so honored by our society.  I felt that if I couldn’t give reason or proof for what I was doing it wouldn’t have validity.  Even though I know at a deep level where my information comes from I can’t prove it.

Psychic and visionary perception cannot be verified objectively because it is the art of seeing things that lie beyond the physical plane.  The seer transcends the 3 normal methods of perception: sensing using the 5 senses, analyzing and feeling with the chemical reactions that come from feelings, and enters the realm where she simply knows things.

I shied away from my mission because I couldn’t verify it with my mind to make it acceptable to other people.  I have often been asked “What does it mean/”, “How do you know?”, and “Can you explain it to me?”.  When I couldn’t come up with an answer people shook their heads or rolled their eyes.  I felt inadequate not being able to explain things that I knew 100% true intuitively.

It chose the safe road…

Ahh, but now I am being pushed to return to my path.  I am a different person than I was in 2006.  I have the consciousness to support doing my visionary work and not worrying about what people think.  I don’t need to feel uncomfortable with people’s questions because I know that whether someone gets my work from a left brain perspective or not they will gain understanding from a higher place within them and my work will have an impact.

So…I am back!



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